Monday, May 11, 2009

HypnoArt!

Instant Neuroaesthetic Programming!


Mick Reasor
Gouache on paper
2.5 x 3.5 inches

Because they contain no glitter or metallic paints, these things usually look way BETTER in the scan than they do in person. Just try to hide your disappointment to spare my feelings.

Hey Kids!

The traditional goal of art is creating the AESTHETIC experience in viewers. The opposite of aesthetic is anesthetic and visual anesthesia has the potential of inducing the TRANCE STATE!

Imagine having the power to induce INSTANT AESTHETIC TRANCE!

“Own this art and put anyone into trance easily and quickly.”

I tried for years to learn the Aesthetic Induction, and I was COMPLETELY frustrated. I got to the point where I thought it was all hooey. It wasn’t until I got some 100%REALART MickPainting ACEOs by Mick that it all began to work. I got these little paintings and was totally confused when I first started looking at them. Hamsters and Queens driving tractors with glitter pens and Mounties…I didn’t have a clue what it was about until I started realizing that I was SUPPOSED to be confused.

After looking at the paintings for a while I realized there was a method to his madness. There WAS madness anyway. And I began to see the potential of little paintings on unsuspecting victims subjects

I HAD THE KEYS TO THE RESTROOM AND THEY WERE ATTACHED TO A 16 INCH LENGTH OF GALVANIZED PIPE!



“Without these paintings I couldn’t get results. Buying these paintings was the best thing I could have done.”

I want you to know the absolute truth. Mick is not a miracle worker. Don’t expect his art to give you everything you need to put people into trance instantly - or to levitate for that matter - or to make people cluck like chickens.

They work like magic, but it may take more than one or even six small paintings to achieve the total effect.

“I ordered some ACEOs by Mick. When they arrived in the mail it was like Kwanzaa or maybe St. Swithin‘s Day. I ripped open the envelope and threw aside the surplus protective sheep card and there glistening in its polypropylene penny sleeve was the ACEO. I called a distant estranged cousin and told him to sell his trailer and book it on over here. We started looking at the art and couldn’t wait to get started. After washing some Cheetos down with Root Beer we looked at the art and we both started ZONING out (yes it was THAT good) so we washed our orange fingers and went to the mall.”

“I wish I could tell you that the little painting put the most beautiful girl I had ever seen into a TRANCE so deep that she couldn’t see what a pathetic GEEK I was and agreed to do my bidding (and my laundry). I wish I could tell you that but I’m trying to keep ALL of my claims ambiguous and confusing - like when I use quotation marks, who am I quoting? Is it me talking or an endorsement or what - , but we had a blast. And we could tell that people were really responding differently to us.”

Buy this painting today and you will receive:

  • An envelope with YOUR address mysteriously inscribed on the front!
  • DNA sample from where I licked the envelope.
  • Cancelled US Postage sufficient to cover a 1 ounce rigid letter!
  • A lovely scrap of teal colored matt board!
  • One 81/2 by 11 inch piece of folded office paper.
  • A surplus Ovine note card. (mute testimony to a past bad business decision)
  • The actual painting, executed in monochromatic gray gouache. Recent studies indicate that ALL forms of color may be cancer causing. These black and white paintings are the ONLY truly safe paintings on eBay!
  • In lieu of a Certificate of Authenticity (which Mick thinks are for suckers), a piece of card stock containing all information necessary for initiating a lawsuit against Mick!





“I have a load of MickPaintings on my china hutch and most people find them pretty annoying.”


-WD, California State


“I have this sister with a china hutch and most people find her pretty annoying.”

-BS, California State


“I bought some MickHamsters thinking they were like McNuggets or something, but they are paintings.”

-KV, Arizona State


“Wanna see some pictures of my favourite kitty?

-KV, NOT the same KV as the one from Arizona


"I've been in a trance ever since receiving that Clint Howard portrait in the mail."

-KV, Hooterville



Results are atypical. Your results may vary. Batteries not included. Void where prohibited. NO shipping to Alabama, don't even ask. These claims have not been evaluated by anyone with a lick of sense. Serious bidders should look elsewhere for seirous listings. Side effects may include nausea, vomiting, dry mouth, wet mouth, wet nose, dizzyness, difficulty swallowing, diarhea, blurred vision, indiscriminate use of puntucation, expecially commas, troubling dreams, itching, foul odors, hair loss and in rare cases death. Do not drive or operate machinery until you know how MickArt will effect you. If swelling and redness persist call someone who cares your care provider.







Enlarged

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