100%REALART: September 2006

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Sunday, September 24, 2006

A Christmas Carol: Jacob Marley's Ghost

Gouache on Rives BFK
2.5 x 3.5 inches

Illustration Friday: Phobia

Although not technically a heliophobe, Wendell could be mistaken for one when he finally emerges from his mother's basement after a Halo marathon.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Josh Harmonieux: School Photographer

After a one-man Canadian crimewave Josh Harmonieux takes it on the lam and accepts employment as a school photographer somewhere in the southern states. Somehow his Jarts brand Lawn Missile Game smuggling, Mountie boiling, gratuitous rib shooting, public nudity and shameless self-promotion failed to show up on the cursory background check. Here, Harmonieux uses an emu puppet and thinly veiled threats to elicit nervous smiles from his juvenile subjects.

Constable Singh's Bagpipes

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Charley "Horse" Chiemelewski

This card portrays Charley "Horse" Chiemelewski, Veteran guard with the New Jersey Knights. Off the field "Horse" likes a nice cabbage roll and plays tuba and trombone in the family polka band. Chiemelewski was suspended and fined in his rookie season for missing bed check. The gig at the Zalewski wedding reception went late. Charley is happy he played (football, not polka music) after the introduction of plastic helmets and before the introduction of unibrow tweezing. "E-Eye E-Eye E-Eye OH!!!"

Constable Singh, the Sikh Mountie, Tapes His Stick

As the days grow shorter and cooler Constable Singh, a proud member of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police currently assigned to the prairies of Alberta, tapes his stick in preparation for the upcoming hockey season. Thanks to Commissioner Inkster, Constable Singh is allowed to replace the traditional Stetson hat with the traditional Sikh turban. It remains to be seen what kind of headgear he will wear on the ice.